An Apple Tablet?
I was deep in despair, no new products form Cupertino in ages, what was I to do? I sought help in psychotherapy, was admitted to the hospital for macintox, yet the problem persisted. There were rumors amuck yet nothing solid. An event was planned, there appeared to be hope on the horizon, would Job’s let me down, or was this some foolish attempt to hype the itunes store, are the Beatles coming?
(side note) Steve Jobs is not human, he is really an alien that came from The Woz’s belly, If you’ve seen Woz lately you’ll take note that another is about to be birthed, should that creature make it out alive Jobs most certainly will be consumed. But I digress.
Anticipation, sweat beading upon my furrowed brow I wait wishing California wasn’t 2 hours behind. I mean they’re freaking ahead in everything else why not time for pete’s sake?
I know at this moment Jobs is toking some purple Krishna or whatever the docs prescribed for all those health problems, but what about me? What about us? Don’t we mater? I frikin live in Alabama and there is no legal way to calm my macintitus, there is no cure for this dis-ease. Still I pray, to the golden gods of aesthetic hardware, fulfill my deepest desire and bless me with this most hole-y device. Allow me to video conference in style, allow me to feel a sense of cool when I whip out a sleek slice of techno-bliss, allow me to feel better about myself knowing that the regular guy on the street oohs and ahhhhs at my very existence having one of these in my possession.
Yes, Mr. Jobs, give me a reason to keep on living.
Oh yeah and watch out for that beast by way of the Woz, it’s sure to consume your very creative existence.
Sincerely…